I am not terribly conventional, I have a doctorate, and I am fairly independent. I am really energetic and still enjoy many of the things I enjoyed in my 20s and 30s.
But in online dating, men my age are not looking at women my age. The men I do hear from are older than me by 10-15 years and are looking for a far more mellow lifestyle (or trying too hard to be youthful — if it is genuine, great, if not, it’s annoying).
She was mature for her age and I was immature for my age. There’s also this misconception that older guys are better in bed. Unless you’re dating 16-year-olds (not recommended unless you’re also a teen), chances are the guy you’re sleeping with will have had a fair amount of experience and if your bodies work together, your bodies will work together.
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’ Once, I met a guy whilst travelling and it wasn’t until we were on a flight to another country together that I realised I’d never asked how old he was. I almost spat out my drink but then thought, ‘Why does knowing how many years he’s lived on this earth age change anything?
’ It’s the same with platonic friends too – while working in Sri Lanka, my closest friend was nine years younger than me, and it wasn’t a problem.
I tend to meet guys while I’m away travelling/working overseas and most of them are younger than me, but age really isn’t as big of a deal when you’re travelling as it is back home.
Nikki, 33 agrees: ‘I pretty much only date younger men now, which I think is to do with my lifestyle choices of travelling and doing seasonal work.
I don’t want to date men who remind me of my dad, who want quiet dinners or sitting home watching movies.
On the flip side, when I meet men in real life, I do attract more of the type of man I like — my age or younger, energetic, out and about — and yet when they find out how old I am or that my kids are in their late teens, they get freaked out (much like they get when they learn I have a Ph.How does one navigate this “glass ceiling” of aging? Dear Fran, Here’s the deal with middle-aged men online; they may post that they’re looking for much younger women, but you can actually ignore that little tidbit of information and write to them anyway.An older man can dream of his fantasy arm-candy, his midlife crisis temporary cure, his ego boosting babe.I might be 31 but marriage, babies and mortgages are not on my radar.Partly because the current financial climate doesn’t allow the latter, but also because I enjoy my freelance, nomadic lifestyle.‘And more often than not by the time a girl is 30 she is thinking about kids and a family.