No one can do that for another because it isn’t his job.He can only support his partner’s willingness to love himself. You remember, the dog that is given something to eat when a bell is rung.
That means if you are highly critical of yourself, you will find others who are critical as well. As you realize your magnificence, others mirror that awareness.
Thus, it can be said that if we don’t heal our relationship wounds, they are repeated again and again.
They set up their marriage on the premise that they were to make each other happy but that was not possible. They don’t feel valued, hugged, reinforced, or affirmed. Don’t think too much of yourself or give yourself credit.
Neither could supply the love and affirmation the other needed because they didn’t have it. And they weren’t taught to supply this to themselves either. This is the edict they live by and the result is neediness: “I need to make me feel good.”Of course, that is impossible.
People talk about protecting themselves from being hurt but they don’t understand how they were hurt in the first place. It is in the wagging tail of a puppy and the helpful stranger giving directions, plowing your snow, or carrying your groceries. The “bad” elements were concoctions of the ego and they lure you to frame these individuals as evil or mean spirited.
People experience pain because they have been taking personally the words and actions of others. We forgive people — their warts and their wounds too. This assertion keeps your mind trapped in misperception and low energy.
Soon the dog starts to salivate when the bell rings whether there is food or not.
The dog has associated one stimulus with the other.
The good/bad news is that it is your job to recognize your beauty and magnificence. This is good because it puts the power in your hands. Lynette and Dan eventually parted and neither person was honest about what happened.